Your friend has low supply?

As someone who has struggled with low supply for both of my babies, who had over forty appointments with lactation consultants throughout Switzerland and also in Australia, who used formula and donor milk through a Supplemental Nursing System for almost six months, who tried seemingly every milk-building remedy from every culture on earth, it's time I write this post.

I had some truly wonderful friends during this time, but I also lost friends during this time, which still breaks my heart.

The first few beads sent to me by friends and family around the world for strength and love during the birth and postnatal period. My most valuable possession. There is so much love right there.
If you find yourself sitting next to your friend who is struggling with low supply, whether you consider it true low supply or merely 'perceived low supply', here's a few tips.

Disclaimer: I am a very sensitive person. During the first six months of each of my baby's lives, I was the most vulnerable and emotionally pained that I have ever been. All I can do is share my own personal experience.



WHAT TO AVOID SAYING

1. 'Do you really have low supply?' This is hard. There is a lot of information out there about how to ensure you truly do have low supply, and that your fussing baby, empty-feeling breasts and bottle-guzzler don't necessarily mean you aren't producing enough milk. But you are her friend, not her lactation consultant. Don't question her, don't expect her to explain to you in detail about all the ways she is (or feels she is) unable to provide for her baby. Don't get her to justify her pain to you.

2. 'Have you tried fennel tea?' or any number of remedies... lactation cookies, beer, more skin to skin, checking for tongue tie, staying in bed for a weekend with baby, meditation, domperidone, etc. Again, unless she specifically asks you for advice, don't offer it. Chances are you are the ten-thousandth person that has mentioned this to her, and you might just be the straw that breaks the camel's back and have a box of breastfeeding tea thrown in your face.

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